memorial for grandpa...

Grandma helped by picking some of their favorire songs....
Here is the Video

Goodbye Grandpa...

Aaron's Granpa Passed away yesterday evening. What a great man.


Ross McCullough, Jr., 88, passed away peacefully Sunday evening, March 15, surrounded by family at Mt Carmel East Hospital in Columbus from pulmonary complications. Ross was born October 5, 1920, in Coshocton to Ross McCullough Sr and Alpha (Davis) McCullough (who preceded him in death) and farmed in Coshocton until 1964 when the family moved to Wayne County, where he continued farming. In September 2008 he and his wife moved to Gahanna OH. He served on the Boards of Education of Roscoe/Three Rivers Schools and Coshocton County Schools, and was a member of Shreve United Methodist Church, Masonic Lodge and Eastern Star. Ross enjoyed gathering with his family for games and cards and shuffle boarding when they wintered in Florida. Ross is survived by his wife of 67 years, Phyllis (Gilmore) McCullough, daughters Barbara (Rodger) Crawford of Columbus, Nancy (Milton) Coninx of Johnstown , William (Shiela) of Coshocton, Kim (LuAnn) of Shreve, and Karl (Terri) of Johnstown, Ohio, eight grandchildren, and 15 great-grandchildren. He was preceded in death by his brother John McCullough, and sisters Mary Brubaker and Maxine Wright. Calling hours will be held Wednesday, March 18, from 4 to 7 PM Schlabach Funeral Home 212 Jones St. Shreve, Ohio. The funeral will held Thursday at 11:00 a.m., with calling hours at 10:00, at Shreve United Methodist Church, 430 N Main St, Shreve, OH 44676. Donations may be made to individual’s charity of choice.

Her love lives on...

We went to the memorial service for my sister. It was so reflective of who she was. My brother Darryl snapped this image of the balloon launch. I love it. I thought about taking a snap shot of it, but forgot my phone in the funeral home. I am glad someone got a shot.

My big sis...

Many of you have been following my blog for sometime and know that my older sister was diagnosed with Lung cancer about 4 months ago. This morning, she lost her battle. We are very sad. Her service is on Tuesday in her hometown of Monroe Michigan. She will be greatly missed.
As I tried to sort out my feelings today, I had bouts of anger, frustration, sadness, helplessness, and one itty bitty joyful moment. Wait, did I just write JOYFUL? How can someone who lost a loved one feel a tinge of Joy? Before you place the judgment...let me explain.
I had some errands to run today. I had to pick up the large portrait of my sister and the memorial cards at the photo lab. On the way out, I sat in my car...praying and asking God to give me peace about the situation. I then put out there "Hey God, if you are into giving signs...please give me a sign that Lolly (my sis) is dancing with my mom in Heaven".
Well...
Within 5 minutes, I pulled into a Starbucks to grab me a coffee. As I entered the shop, I listened to what was playing. It was the Sarah McLaughlin song "Angel". For most people, this song does not have a special meaning. For our family...it does, a very big meaning. It is the song that was played at my mothers funeral. Every time we hear the song, we think of her home going to Heaven. We usually cannot get through the song on any given day. So, I am standing in Starbucks crying tears of shock and tears of Joy. A coincidence you may say...I believe it was a confirmation. Not because I tried to make it into something and read into the situation....But because I felt God's love and Peace with me at that very moment...right in Starbucks. God met me there in a very special way.


Things about my sister I will not forget...
*when I was little, she would always give me pieces of her jewelry. I think I have about 50 pieces in a box that I have collected over the years. They have never left the box.
*Her kind heart and compassionate spirit. Always willing to give.
*The love that she passed onto each of her children and her husband.
*The way she would call me "Hun"
*She never complained about anything. She always had a thankful heart.
*I was always introduced to her friends as being "my baby sis". I seriously do not think she ever referred to me as "Judy". Cute.
*and the list goes on....

This picture actually cracks me up a little. I never brought it out until now. We were at the beach together and she said "lets play Photographer Judy". This was about 12 years ago. So I snapped a bunch of mockery pictures making fun of cheesy photographers and their poses She then snapped some pretty good ones of me too. It was totally her idea to do this pose. I remember her laughing really hard after this picture was taken and squeezing her legs together so she wouldn't pee her pants. I actually love the picture now just because of the story behind it.


Well, am heading off to bed. I had some sorting out my thoughts to do before I hit the sack. Please lift our family up in prayer this week. It is going to be a difficult one. You can view her online obituary and leave a thought for the family here.

Cancer really, really stinks.

My big sister Vivian was having problems with her vision. Her lymph nodes around her neck were also very swollen. She went to the Hospital last week and with many tests later, it was confirmed that she has cancer. She has a small spot on her brain, in her lung and the lymph node was removed and tested for Cancer. The news of the lymph node came back last night and it was cancerous. She will undergo a series of radiation and chemo treatments. All we can do is hope and pray for the best outcome. Please pray for her and pray for everyone involved. Cancer has never been a topic of discussion until my mom passed away of cancer last year. Unfortunately, my mom's cancer was progressed. From what I am hearing of my sister's situation, it is in it's early stages. There is hope.

If you feel inclined, please donate to help early detection of Lung Cancer. Click here to enter mymom's personal site on the the American Lung Association's Wall of Remembrance.

I will keep you posted on her progress. Right now, hope is there and she is in good spirits.

I feel helpless at this point. Traveling to see her is hard. My body is preparing for the baby. I am going to try to make a trip up there in the next week to see her and pray with her. Unfortunatly, I cannot help in any other way right now. Even after the baby is born, it is going to be difficult to go up to Michigan and offer her any type of help. I feel stuck and sad that I cannot do anything.

Mom's memorial garden...

Around the time I knew that my mom was passing, I read about an idea for the funeral that I thought was special. Seed packets. The purpose of the packets is to remember your loved one and reflect on their beautiful lives as the flowers bloom the next year. I ended up with a lot of seeds left over and found them late spring of this year. Since we didn't have anything planted on the side of the house (due to my planting, taking out, planting and taking out problem), I decided to scatter these seed packets on the side of the house. I have been diligent about watering and caring for the tiny seedlings. All of my hard work payed off. Last week, I found my first flower. It just so happened to be a blue "Forget me Not" (how appropriate eh?). Here are some of the other flowers coming out...
Aren't they just beautiful? It is impossible to not think of my mom as I look at these flowers.

Another week that will be hard to face.

This weekend is Mothers day. In most ways I dread this day for this is the first Mothers day without my mom. I have had a rough week dealing with my own "when it rains it pours" times and haven't had much time to think about Mothers day. My sister sent me this poem about a week ago, but I wasnt ready to read it. I recieved an email from a dear friend of mine and realized it was the same poem...I thought I should read it. I am glad I did. I wasn't sure how I was going to approach this Mothers day, but now that I have read this...it will help me rejoice in who my mom was and how she has shaped me into the person I am today. A week or so ago I visited my dad and brought a bleeding heart plant for his yard. I always gave my mom some kind of plant on Mother's day. I didn't feel right not taking anything up to commemorate her day. As I was shopping for a plant, I was drawn to a bleeding heart. For some reason the name "bleeding heart" reminded me of the way my heart has ached for my mom this past year and how much I have missed her. However, when I looked at the beauty of the flower on the plant, it reminded me of her beautiful life and the wonderful things it produced..just as this plant does. I wanted to explain this to my dad, but it was just too hard at the time. I purchased the same plant for my garden as a living reminder of her beautiful life.



MOTHER

For those lucky to still be blessed with your Mom,
this is beautiful. For those of us who aren't, this is even more beautiful. For those who are moms, you'll love this.

The young mother set her foot on the path of life. 'Is this the long way?' she asked. And the guide said: 'Yes, and the way is hard
And you will be old before you reach the end of it.. But the end will be better than the beginning.'

But the young mother was happy, and she would not believe that anything could be better than these years. So she played with her children, and gathered flowers for them along the way, and bathed them in the clear streams; and
the sun shone on them, and the young Mother cried, 'Nothing will ever be lovelier than this.'


Then the night came, and the storm, and the path was dark, and the children shook with fear and cold, and the mother drew them close and covered them with her mantle, and the children said, 'Mother, we are not afraid, for you are near, and no harm can come.'

And the morning came, and there was a hill ahead, and the children climbed and grew weary, and the mother was weary. But at all times she said to the children,' A little patience and we are there.' So the children climbed, and when they reached the top they said, 'Mother, we would not have done it without you.'

And the mother, when she lay down at night looked up at the stars and said, 'This is a better day than the last, for my children have learned fortitude in the face of hardness. Yesterday I gave them courage. Today,I've given them strength.'

And the next day came strange clouds which darkened the earth, clouds of war and hate and evil, and the children groped and stumbled, and the mother said:
'Look up. Lift your eyes to the light.'
And the children looked and saw above the clouds
an everlasting glory, and it guided them beyond the
darkness. And that night the Mother said,
'This is the best day of all, for
I have shown my children God.'

And the days went on, and the weeks and the months and the years, and the mother grew old and she was little and bent. But her children were tall and strong, and walked with courage. And when the way was rough, they lifted her, for she was as light as a feather; and at last they came to a hill,
and beyond they could see a shining road and golden gates flung wide. And
mother said, 'I have reached the end of my journey. And now I know the end
is better than the beginning, for my children can
walk alone, and their children after them.'

And the children said, 'You will always walk with us, Mother, even when you have gone through the gates.' And they stood and watched her as she went on alone, and the gates closed after her. And they said: 'We cannot see her but she is with us still.

A Mother like ours is more than a memory. She
is a living presence.......'

Your Mother is always with you.... She's the whisper
of the leaves as you walk down the street; she's the smell of bleach
in your freshly laundered socks; she's the cool hand
on your brow when you're not well. Your Mother lives
inside your laughter. And she's crystallized in every tear drop.
She's the place you came from, your first home; and
she's the map you follow with every step you take. She's your first love
and your first heartbreak, and nothing on earth can
separate you.

Not time, not space... not even death!

paczki Video...

My sister found this awesome video on Paczki. Since I gained 10 pounds eating these things last week, I thought I would share this great 'documentary" about them.

Hormones or Sentiment??

Today I cried over a Doughnut. I guess it isn't an ordinary doughnut, it is a Paczki. My mom would correct me on that little fact. Today is Fat Tuesday and basically it is the day to eat all of the bad things you want before Lent begins. Paczki Day (yes, it is actually a day for the Polish) is a yummy day that my mom loved.

Yesterday, I opened this box of Paczki and started to cry. I sat on the ground and Aaron came in the kitchen and he saw that I was crying. I said "my mom loved Paczki Day" and I bursted into tears. It was kind of funny because I am a little hormonal anyway. He smiled a little because to him, it was just a doughnut. To me, it was a reminder of my mom. He then understood, still with a little smile on his face. Today, I had an uninterrupted moment to cry while I ate the Lemon filled Paczki. I know that it is particially my pregnancy hormones, but also a lot of sentimental emotion. I remember my mom always searching to find the very same Paczki that she use to by in Hamtramck. She would specially order them from different bakeries where she lived. She wanted to make sure she had her Paczki for that special day. When she would finally get them, she would take notice of the ways it wasn't a real Paczki. I also remember the time that I attempted to make Paczki at home for my mom. I carefully followed the directions from my Polish Cookbook. They seemed to be a little hard, but I figured that "maybe that is the way they make them in Hamtramck". I sent them in a box to my mom and she received them on Fat Tuesday. I will never forget her telling me so nicely as she was laughing "they are hard as Rocks". I guess that was a pretty good indication that I didn’t' make them like they did in Hamtramck.

SHE KNEW HER PACZKI!

I hope my mom is getting all of the "real" Paczki she wants right now. I can only imagine what Heaven is like with all of her Polish relatives....doing the polka with a "real" Paczki in each hand.

The Strength of a Polish Woman

Ahh, I love being Polish!

An elderly Polish man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite pierogi with fried onions wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs. Downstairs, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen, where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were hundreds of his favorite pierogi. Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of love from his wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man? He threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the pierogi was already in his mouth. With a trembling hand he reached up to the edge of the table, when suddenly he was smacked with a wooden spoon by his wife.

"Back off!" she said. "Those are for the funeral. "

January 7th, 2008

Well, as many of you know, my dear mom passed away this year and I am really getting hit hard recently. I think with everything with the Holidays it stirred up some feelings. Yesterday, when I was in the store the song that was played at her funeral was played and I burst into tears. It didn't bother me that others were looking at me as I am sobbing. It was a good cry~if that makes any sense. I just wonder when moments like that will be gone. I am not sure if I will feel guilty when they start to become numb to me and am not sure if I really want them to go. Until about a month ago, the first thing I thought of when I woke up was my mom in the hospital and her last day here. It is now almost 7 months later and I think of that time about 4 times per week...progress I guess you can call it. I miss her dearly. She was a very special person and I am now seeing a lot of her in me...which I wouldn't trade for anything (well, maybe the inheritance of cold sores and a little bit of her stubbornness, but everything else is for me to keep). I miss her.

Here is the memorial video I made for the funeral...